September 23, 2008
Do men want more than sex from a woman? truth or lie?
Of course, men want more than just sex from a woman. How about a smile now and then?
Men try so damn hard to please their woman in hopes of sex. It is the only way men know of, if their woman cares about them, is to have sex when their woman wants to have sex with them. Therefore I think, men are strongly motivated to please their women.
And dang it woman! If you are not going to smile, you can at least do the washing and ironing!
September 20, 2008
Can a person quit smoking truth or lie
If you smoke, I bet YOU you won't make it to 100!
I’ve had this picture in the ideas folder for some time now. I knew I wanted to do something with it, but I just could not figure out what I wanted to do. First I thought, ahhh!, make a joke, the line could say, “I knew it, the whinny liberals don’t want us to enjoy our life!”. Finally it hit me; what I wanted to write about smoking here is that I am a former smoker and I can tell you this – between my ex-wife and smoking I am not going to see 100.
What I want to say about smoking and pass on is how I quit, because its a real pain in the butt to quit. I was no lightweight smoker, I smoked 2 packs a day. I started smoking when I was 16, you know to be cool. Then I got married. My new wife (at that time) asked me to quit. I did and did not smoke again until I got to know the real woman that I had married and got so stressed out that I started smoking again.
So I started smoking again. Well, it took me ten years then one day it hit me. I thought to myself, you dumb ass your killing your self do you really want that c___ to out live you? So, I started trying to quit, first cold turkey. I had done that one once before but I was newly married to what I thought was a good woman and I was getting sex so cold turkey was not all that bad. That was when I was single and hooked and I tried cold turkey – no luck at all. To make a long story short, I tried several ways before I came up with what worked for me. I took an empty coffee can outside, smoked my last cigarette, then I took the money for the next two packs for that day, put the money in the coffee can and then I made a vow to myself that I would put the money in the coffee can each day and I could not touch it for two years but, if I had a cigarette even a bummed one, I would burn all the money in the can. I made it for 21 days, I broke my vow to myself – there was 80 dollars in that can. Money was tight at that time and really important to me and it damn near killed me to keep my vow to myself and to burn up the $80.00 but I knew it would have been burned up anyway if I had smoked the 21 packs.
I have not had a cigarette since 1998 and after two years I had saved a little bit over $2,735.00 in that same can. I added this money towards buying a nicer Yamaha ATV. Mostly I am so glad that I quit.
If you smoke and want to quit I hope you find a way too.
I hope to hear some other true story’s for quitting smoking of course you can lie too.
September 13, 2008
Getting a deal when you know they are down
Hypothetical:
Say you are at the flea market and you see a woman there with two small children trying to sell personal items. You can tell she and her kids are down on their luck. It is near the end of the day. Her kids are a bit whinny. You talk with her and find out her husband died last year. She tells you it has been a slow day at the flea market. She really needs the money to feed her kids. The only thing she has of any value is her wedding ring. She tells you her late husband paid $10,000 for it eight years ago and it is obvious worth that, but she needs to feed her kids. She is willing to sell it for $500.00. She is desperate. You have the $500.00 on you but you pull out $150.00 and tell her that is all you have. She cries as she hands you her ring.
Truth or Lie – Would you take advantage of a person down on their luck? It is not like you know them.
September 4, 2008
Is the end near? – Truth or Lie
Professor Obvious of WASU gave a lecture today on the state of the world:
Look toward our future! Today there are approximately 6.7 billion people on this little planet. In the next hundred years all these people will be dead, well most of them anyway. What a tragedy! Who will dispose of all these bodies? Think about this too, more people will be born during the next one hundred years and many of those people will die! And what about all the animals? Think about the great blue whales, how many of them will die? What about the lions and tigers and bears? We worry about war, oil, poverty, terrorists and politics but who thinks about the great disaster that is facing us all other than those of us here at WASU?
At WASU, we are thankful to those professor’s who both seek and expose the truth! Obviously, our favorite professor received thunderous applause and a standing ovation from the appreciative audience here at We’re All Screwed University.
August 23, 2008
Cheating on your Mate
Who Lies more about cheating on there mate, men or women ?
The truth was obscure, too plain and too pure. To live it you had to explode.
—Bob Dylan
Lie of the Day 